5. They treat you as an equal

Uneven power dynamics are a big no-no in relationships. Someone needs to meet you as their equal, and if they act dominantly, make disrespectful comments, or speak down to you, it can be a red flag that indicates an abusive relationship in the future. Don’t be silent if someone ignores your boundaries—you’re worthy of respect and love.

6. Ability to have serious conversations

Many people dread “DTR” or defining the relationship, but the ability to have tough conversations is a sign that you’ll have a strong future. If you ask them how long they usually date someone before they decide to be monogamous, are they responsive? Or what about asking what things annoy them or what topics they fought about with past partners? Having these conversations allows you to be more comfortable discussing boundaries and what respect means in your own relationship.

7. Accountability 

The ability to apologize is a big one. People need to admit when they’ve made a mistake and own up to those errors without someone flipping the blame on someone else. This validates the other person’s experience and also acknowledges responsibility. Ideally, someone will ask questions about how they hurt you and seek to fix the situation rather than getting defensive. 

8. Vulnerability

Vulnerability is sexy, and it’s a must-have for a healthy relationship. The other person should be able to talk about their fears and insecurities or flaws, along with their wants and desires. This is the deepest form of honesty, it’s letting someone else into your inner world. Not that oversharing on the first date isn’t the same as being vulnerable!